I am...

I am the baby who was brought up by his grandparents when his mother suffered from post-natal depression and had to, like her new born son, learn how to stand on her own two feet again.

I am the toddler who grew up in fear of his mother’s return home from work because that would signal the start of his lessons, the same lessons which would set the foundations for the rest of his life.

I am the kid who took the school bus to Primary 1 without his parents, because they simply couldn’t fork out the time, and wondering why the other kids were crying when their parents were there.

I am the boy who insisted on wanting to learn how to play the piano, which eventually turned into a chore.

I am the boy who stole Archie comics from the local mama shop because I couldn’t afford them.

I am the brother who fought with you all the time when we were kids.

I am the brother who tailed the bully who beat you up all the way to his house before proceeding to beat him up too.

I am the brother who got jealous and hurt because you told me your friend’s older brother was cooler.

I am the brother who is different from you, and yet the same as you in so many ways.

I am the son who cried beneath the living room table, when he saw you two fight and did not know why.

I am the son who cried when I saw you with another man because that meant my parents would become my mum and my dad.

I am the son who made you cry for not choosing the path you wanted for me.

I am the boyfriend who made you cry so many times simply because you did something I didn’t approve of, forgetting in the process that whenever I did something you didn’t approve of, you turned the other cheek.

I am the boyfriend who would intentionally pick a fight with you on my way to your office, just so you would be surprised and touched to see me there with flowers in my hand.

I am the boyfriend who would pretend to answer a call, hide in the toilet and smoke, simply because your mum doesn't approve of my smoking habit.

I am the boyfriend who followed you all the way down to Laguna Country Club, sitting there in silence while you tried to comfort your upset father.

I am the boyfriend who would rather go hungry than to see you starve.

I am the man who plunged into setting up my own business, simply because it felt right then.

I am the man who cuddled my kid to sleep on the first day he came home with us from the pet store, willing to give him all the love I could muster.

I am the man who is willing to do anything in the world to make sure that the both of you are well taken care of for the rest of your lives.

I am that man. I am that boy. I am that child – yet I am nothing without all of you.