Dear Santa

"Dear Mr Claus,
wow! Has it really been another year already? Where did 2005 go?

Well, its Christmas again and everyone's happy. Almost everyone at least - you should be pretty pissed cause while everyone is out there tonight partying, you're out working like mad. And to add insult to injury, they even set a deadline for you and countdown happily to it while you try to deliver just that one more present before time runs out. Oh well, at least the traffic up won't be too bad. I don't think many people will be flying tonight, so you have a pretty free reign of the skies.

I'm from Singapore, Mr Claus. You may not have heard of us, but we celebrate Christmas here too. About 5% of the citizens here tonight will be at their respective churches for midnight mass. These are the people who try to practise the 'real meaning of Christmas' - in other words, you can forget about bringing them any gifts at all cause they don't buy into the entire commercialisation of Christmas. The other 90% of the citizens will be out partying at their respective Christmas Countdown parties and generally enjoying their long weekend. The remaining 5% will be like you - working. These people include the crew for the parties that the ther 90% go for. Oh - and me.

Santa, I've been a really good boy this year. I havn't made fun of people as much this year and I didn't even come up with my customary Christmas list this year. (Actually, I havn't come up with it because even though I've done the list for several years, I've never gotten anything from them. So I've decided to hold off coming up with a list until I befriend a couple more rich kids.) So instead of asking for Christmas gifts this year, could I ask for a Christmas miracle instead please?

To reward me for being a good boy, could you please make sure that there is a HUGE thunderstorm tonight? You see, if there is a huge thunderstorm, all those people at the outdoor parties like the one at Sentosa would be stuck in the downpour. These parties are generally crowded too, so they won't be able to leave the area without much difficulty, so they're gonna be cold, wet and miserable. AND if the thunderstorm is big enough, then there is a chance that there might be an island wide blackout when the power lines are hit by lightning. Then, those people who are enjoying their parties indoor at the clubs and pubs won't be able to enjoy their parties too.

Mr Claus, I guess you must have figured already that having to work and being unable to celebrate, I want the whole of Singapore to suffer together with me. If I can't be happy, then everyone else must be miserable too.

Thank you so much Mr Claus. Send my love to Mrs Claus.
Lotsa Love,
Kenn

PS I realise that the request of mine is really mean and therefore qualifies me to be a bad boy - but if you think about it carefully, I've actually been a good boy for an entire year. You can place this on my tab for next year. I don't really care if I get coal in my stockings for next year.